The Modern Day Maurice Chevalier

After all these years in the UK, you'd think Arsene Wenger wouldn't be quite so, well, French. Every time he gets up in front of the camera, he's like a modern day Maurice Chevalier. You almost expect him to blurt out with a refrain

"Thank Heavens for little boys girls..."

But no. While Wenger may well be one of the Premier League's great managers, he's certainly no orator. In fact, he starts of every thought with a "well err...." I counted 21 of them in the 2 minute interview he gave following the 4-2 win over Bolton. That's an impressive "well err... rate (WER)" of 11 per minute or one every 6 seconds or so.

Please note that the quote "Well err... I cannot believe the errr... referee did not see err... the diabolical foul that Gallas made on Davies...errr" did not appear in this interview. Plenty of others did though. Witness below.



By the way, please support my sponsors and the good people at Loan Modify Source. If you need your mortgage payment lowered and have no equity, a job loss or other hardship the people at Loan Modify Source can help. No upfront fees whatsoever. Tell 'em Nick sent you and get 10% off a modification.

Not a Very Funny Week

It's hard to be a humorist when the tradgedy in Haiti is so enormous. Every facet of life in the country has been impacted and the football community is no exception.

The time is NOW to make a difference. The least you can do is text 90999 on you cell phone and donate $10.00 to the Red Cross International Response. The charge will show up on your cell phone bill. Or you can click on the American Red Cross link on the right.

Up next in blogo-land for me is a thought or two about the demise of a once great football club.

Until then, dig deep and help.

Do ALL footballers lack class?

This is one for the "bile in the back of the throat" file. And of course it involves the Evil Empire and the minions of the Dark Lord.

It has been reported that in keeping with the season of giving (to oneself), Man United players had a quick "whip around" the locker room for a paltry $128,000 so they could pick up one of those nifty 100 inch plasma TV's for their players' lounge at Carrington.

Maybe I just don't like Machester United (too bloody right) but this whole thing just seems so... ugly. It really negates all of the good work done by the Manchester United Foundation. I imagine the Rainbow House, New Children's Hospital and other worthy causes could have put that $128,000 to much better use than to provide a bunch of millionaire Manchester United Players a supersized replay of their Leeds FA cup tie. On the other hand, a TV that big is difficult for Sir Alex to fling around during one of legendary "motivational sessions".

But some things will never change and classless footballers are one of them. Maybe next year they should empty their pocket change and pick up one of these. Then they can donate this years' old 100 incher to the waiting room at Wayne's old Granny brothel.

Locally this is good fodder for FIFPro in their ongoing labor dispute with MLS. If most MLS teams where to have a "whip around" their player lounges (if they were lucky enough to have one) they'd be hard pressed to buy a used 8 track player from eBay.

I hope you are enjoying this blog. Tell a friend.

By the way, please support my sponsors and the good people at Loan Modify Source. If you need your mortgage payment lowered and have no equity, a job loss or other hardship the people at Loan Modify Source can help. No upfront fees whatsoever. Tell 'em Nick sent you and get 10% off a modification.

I'll Eat My Shirt

I am not Landon Donovan's favorite person. In fact, I've been persona non grata with Landon and his Agent since I accused him of being a heartless pussy, the great American could-have-been. Hell, we even marketed an exclusive line of "LD10" T-shirts sporting a likeness of the receding one with a pacifier in his mouth and a logo that read "Major League Baby".

But how times change. For those of you that missed one of the weekend's only two Premiership fixtures, Landon's debut with Everton in a match at the Emirates against Arsenal was a real eye-opener.  Landon didn't just seem to cope. He seemed to belong. He handled the pace, physicality and cold weather of the Premiership like he had been there since the start of the season and gave David Moyes the attacking option and was instrumental in the scoreline.

No, Landon wasn't just good, he was very good. Maybe a few years of extra maturity and the day-to-day realities of marriage was enough to truly motivate him to show us what we have known all along he was capable of if he only cared enough to show it.

We'll see how things look at the end of the season but if it keeps on like this I'll gladly eat my LD10 shirt and do it here a T.R.A.W. for you all to see.

I hope you like my new blog. Don't forget to tell everyone you know!!!

 
By the way, please support my sponsors and the good people at Loan Modify Source. If you need your mortgage payment lowered and have no equity, a job loss or other hardship the people at Loan Modify Source can help. No upfront fees whatsoever. Tell 'em Nick sent you and get 10% off a modification.

It's time to get back to it.

So what exactly is this? I mean, we all know that refs are wankers so why a whole blog?

Well, obviously I'd have to be a madman to sit here and moan about refs all day long (only Sir Alex gets to do that) so I thought this would be as good a forum as any for my takes on football, life etc. I'll admit, its been a while since my dulcid tones last graced the airwaves (over a year actually) so as the title says, it's time to get back to it!

For those of you who know me or have followed me through Sports Byline, Sporting News Radio, Sirius and the Fox Soccer Channel you will know that I am an ardent Liverpool supporter. Don't worry though, I promise this blog will not be Liverpool central. There's so much going on (and let's face it, not much of it's at Anfield these days) in the world of football that the trial and tribulations of one Rafa Benitez and co.will not absorb too much of this virtual ink. Oh yeah... there's that World Cup thingy happening this summer as well....

The first World Cup in Africa. So many great African footballers past and present its about time the continent hosted the big show. South Africa seems like a fitting venue - I can remember clearly the days of Apartheid and boycott.

Anyhow, its Friday night and weather permitting we should see a few Premiership matches tomorrow. Arsenal vs Everton should be a good one. Not only are Everton on the bounce but we may see a certain Landycakes making his debut!  After much bellyaching about the lousy weather in Germany during his brief teutonic stints a few years ago he'd better not forget those gloves tomorrow!

Its good to be back. Like MacArthur returning to the Phillipines in 1944...

"I have returned!!!"